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Are you ovu-late to the party?
Lately, I have not posted much about fertility because of my promise to you, my Nickels to keep it light and airy. However, just this once I need to break my own rule; I hope that is okay. Many of you have inquired about the status of my fertility journey and I think it is now the time to share. Before I do share, I would like to preface this post by stating this is will be my last post on a fertility topic. At the time I started my blog my goal was to inform and encourage women to explore their fertility wellness. I did not think at that time there were enough resources and platforms for women to freely explore their fertility options and reproductive health. Personally, I was not sure where to get started or how to proceed when I first began my journey because fertility stuff is not generally apart of our standard women’s wellness screenings. I found that if I did not know to ask certain questions I would likely not get the service I needed at my screenings let alone be redirected to a fertility specialist. This is why it was important for me to create this platform for others. I hope this blog served as a starting point for the novice forging or wishing to forge a path to parenthood now or in the future. However, today I am happy to see there are tons of resources available including CDC campaigns and celebrity endorsed branding that support women’s wellness. I feel comfortable letting off the gas and allowing the bigger platforms to do what they do best, magnify an important subject. It has been a pleasure and a honor to share my journey with you during these past 6 months. I believe I have reached the pinnacle of my efforts and as such, it is time for me to press new creative boundaries with my brand. If you are still interested in fertility topics please be sure to check out my other fertility articles to learn more.
Let jump into it!
Upon miscarrying back October I gave myself a few weeks to grieve before pursuing another 2 rounds of IVF. I did not share my next 2 attempts with many people like I had done before. I opted to only share minor details on social media but nothing too invasive. I wanted to take a more private approach this time around given my first experience was so public. It was important for me to protect my peace and stay in a positive head space. I replaced my reliance on people with fasting, praying and meditating. Though I am not a religious person I wanted to rely on God’s guidance and support during those rounds.
I went into my 2nd attempt without the support of my phenomenal doctor; she was on maternity leave. The doctors who cared for me in her absence were all males and though very competent, they lacked bedside manner. One doctor in particular called during the middle of my cycle and in so many words encouraged me to discontinue my cycle. As I have shared before I have a low eggs reserve which is not a dealbreaker. However, this doctor found my slow maturation process and low egg reserve disconcerting. I do not wish to share all the details of my 2nd attempt but in short, it was unsuccessful.
For my 3rd attempt I was seen by my amazing doctor again! She had returned from maternity leave. I was met with new and unique challenges this round. First, my follicles were not maturing at all. After several days of attempting to mature my follicles and increasing my hormone levels to the highest dosages I had surpassed the timeframe it took for my previous 2 attempts. In addition, I was being inundated at work and we were experiencing frequent winter weather storms in the area. These factors made the commute to my appointments difficult. My mental and physical health were starting to take a nosedive. I had gone into a state of depression by day 15 of my treatment. I can recount returning home from my appointment that day and sitting in the car crying for over a hour. I posted an encrypted photo and message to instagram that day talking about how it is okay to cry. Later that same evening, my nurse called to instruct me to take a dose of Certritide, an ovulation suppressant the first thing the next morning. I reminded the nurse that I had taken all 3 injections of the Certritide at the onset of my cycle as instructed and I was never directed to order more. I could tell the nurse was frantic on her end of the phone. She was trying to organize a way for us to meet so she could give me the medication but finally opted on directing me to take the medication in the evening the next day.
The following Monday I was seen by doctor and to put this in context, generally I am seen by the medical staff for ultrasounds and bloodwork. My doctor would only see me in person for consultations and procedures. I was happy to see my doctor but I knew her in person visit meant she needed to deliver some news. I was on day 17 of my medication which was unprecedented even for me. The doctor and I discussed my situation. She began introducing alternative parenting solutions such as using a donor’s embryo to conceive, this option would be similar to an adoption. After reviewing a few other alternatives including IUI, the doctor finally asked me what I wanted to do. I told her I wanted to stay the course and continue the cycle. She supported my decision and began preparing for my ultrasound. During my ultrasound I could tell by her demeanor something was wrong. She got up abruptly and told me she needed to look at something. When she returned she had a look of dismay on her face as she reported my prognosis, ‘you have ovulated, you lost your mature eggs’. I burst into tears and I mean a hysterical cry. I could tell she wanted to comfort me but you know, covid. She settled for a pat on the knee and handed me a box of a tissue. All that medication and days of preparing were gone! It is my belief my unexpected ovulation was caused by missing my first morning dose of the Cetritide.
Once I was able to gather myself I asked my doctor about the next steps. She wanted to perform an IUI that day in an effort to salvage one of the less mature eggs. She performed the procedure to no avail. Also, that day she voiced her concerns for me and the IVF process. She believed I was putting too much stress on my body and that the plan may have been too aggressive from the start. She mentioned that while IVF has a higher success rate it has been correlated with certain cancers. Additionally, she reinforced the general opinion that IVF is a preferable option in more severe cases of infertility. In my case I was believed to be fertile but just limited in options due to my relationship status. She encouraged me to explore less aggressive options such as IUI. Lastly, she stressed that despite the many medical advancements in fertility there are still many mysteries in the process such as pinpointing the best cycle for a women to try. Even the most fertile women do not produce viable eggs 100% of the time. In fact, most fertile aged women have an 80% chance of conceiving during any giving year which means 2 months out of year a woman can have an all nonviable egg cycle.
Ultimately, I took my doctor’s advice did not pursue another round IVF plus my insurance benefit was on the verge of depletion. I could not afford another treatment even if I wanted to. In closing, I have endured some fertility challenges such as bias doctors, a limited donor selection, lack of support, expensive medical bills, a negligent nurse, diagnosis of fibroids, and many failed attempts including a miscarriage but still, I have no regrets. I learned a lot about my body and reproductive system. Also, if I am being honest I am single person nearing the geriatric pregnancy age without a prospect in sight. I never thought I would have the opportunity to have kids so I am blessed to have had the opportunity to at least try. I am grateful. Comment below if you are reading this and are going through your own fertility journey. I want to send you some peace, love, and baby dust!
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30, Single, and Childless, OH MY!
Nickels if I am being honest I never thought in a million years that I would be in my 30’s, single, and childless. Like I imagine many other women, as a little girl I too dreamt of my wedding day and names for my children.
As I got older, I realized my hope for marriage and children may not come to fruition. I recall during one of my annual women’s wellness screenings the doctor casually suggested egg freezing. The mere suggestion of fertility treatment is hilarious given the cost. Also, it was a harsh reminder of my age. I went from pregnancy prevention to the family planning talks with my doctor. Welcome to one of the many drastic changes in your 30’s 🙂
Being in your 30’s, single, and childless does not have to be a plague. I think women should embrace this stage of their lives as there are many perks to this lifestyle. I once read a list of things women should do before getting married. I would like to add my own spin to that list and challenge my 30 plus, childless, and single ladies to do the following:
Nic #1: Enjoy a domestic and international solo trip. As a single and childless woman you do not need to consult a husband or arrange for a sitter to book a flight. The only arranging you have to do is for your plane seat and a hotel room.
Nic #2: Enjoy a girl’s trip. In early 2020 I got to celebrate my BFF’s birthday in Jamaica on a girl’s trip. Though I was the only single and childless person on the trip. It was nice getting out with the girls.
Nic #3: Purchase your dream car which may not be child safe. It may be a topdown 2 seater! As a single and childless woman you do not have to purchase a car with space for soccer balls and car seats. You can buy the sportiest sports car out there provided you can afford it!
Nic #4: Buy a house, why not? Whatever you own before marriage is yours. Joint assets are nice but do not shy away from accumulating your own wealth while single.
Nic #5: Enjoy the dating experience. This is something I have not done very well but I hear dating can be fun. I think dating is a bit more nuanced with children and a husband. I am guessing you should not date when you are married lol (not unless you are dating your spouse).
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Sunny San Diego
California dreaming is an understatement, in 2018 I moved to one of the most beautiful cities in the US, San Diego, CA. During my time there I made sure to take advantage of the beautiful weather, beaches, and proximity to other cool destinations. I had so many great experiences which has allowed me to curate a list of my top 10 things to do or see while visiting San Diego.
Nic #1: Visit the San Diego Zoo
Nic#2: Take the ferry from the city to Coronado Island. Be sure to grab a picture of the city’s skyline on your way back
Nic #3: Cross the Mexican boarder which is only 20 minutes away or hop on a plane to Hawaii. Beware of the 3 hour time difference in Hawaii. Also, drive up the coast to Malibu to check out Malibu’s Wine Safari or book a train ride to LA for a studio tour (idk if that is still happening post covid) or hike up Runyon canyon.
Nic #4: Drive to La Jolla Cove to see the seals and dine at some swanky restaurants
Nic #5: Hike up or drive up to Mt. Solidade. You will be greeted by a cool breeze, fantastic pacific ocean view, and a WWII memorial
Nic#6: Visit Balboa Park where there are tons of Museums and outdoor recreational fun. Also, check out the USS Midway Museum, a retired Navy ship.
Nic#7: Catch a Padres baseball game at Petco stadium.
Nic#8: You’re in California, go to a weed dispensary and grab some edibles. It’s totally legal 🙂
Nic #9: Visit a brewery, you will have your pick. There are tons of breweries to choose from.
Nic #10: Go to Liberty Public, it is the Reading terminal of San Diego with plenty of bakeries, restaurants, and recreational activities including a fancy movie theater.
Drop a comment below to let me know where you live or have lived and some fun things to see or do in your town!
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The Art of Negotiation
Hi Nickels! It has been a while, I know. A lot has happened since we last caught up. This week in particular has been quite eventful. My employer sold their entire retirement division and as a result I was terminated but offered employment with a new company.
I have been trying to make my mark in the financial industry for over a decade and there have been many impediments such as graduating during a recession, lack of sponsorship and diversity in corporations, and my failed attempts to get into a graduate program of my choice. It has been a wild ride but for some reason I have continued to stay on this path to nowhere despite its many challenges. In 2019, I finally landed a role with my dream employer who has an astounding reputation in the financial industry. I felt hopeful about my future in Finance for the first time since graduating college. However, that all changed after a 30 minute conference call on Tuesday. That’s right, in 30 minutes a decade worth of struggle, triumph, pivots, and plans were all derailed once again. I am still somewhat hopeful as I have decided to pursue my CFP designation in 2020 and recently finished my coursework. I am now eligible to sit for the board exam and accumulate work experience. The road to my designation is long but I believe will be worth it. In the near future I will finally have more control over my career path. Needless to say, the events this week have inspired today’s topic, the art of negotiation. Below are some tips I have learned along the way that may help you or someone you know.
Nic #1: Do not overvalue benefits and bonuses when negotiating the terms of your salary.
I recall my older and wiser cousin encouraging me to error on the side of caution when considering the other benefit offerings during a salary negotiation. Bonuses are not guaranteed income and benefits such health insurance, profit sharing contributions, or match formulas are subject to change. I am so glad I listened to my cousin because when the Merger & Acquisition happened this week my benefits were drastically changed and the future of my bonus is uncertain. It gave me some peace of mind knowing I did not settle on substituting my salary with bonuses and benefits.
Nic #2: You can negotiate more than your salary
It is not all about the money! I know, that sounds crazy lol. Well, it is mostly about the money because you have to be able to support yourself and your family. However, do not be shallow during negotiation time. Think about other opportunities you would like. For me, when I left my prior employer I knew I would be forfeiting much needed vacation time so during negotiations with my new employer I asked for vacation time. I only asked for a few days but I was so happy I made the request. It was not long after I was hired that we endured a global pandemic and were placed on travel restrictions. Before then I was able to utilize the time I had requested during negotiation to take 2 much needed vacations.
Nic #3: You do not have to wait to receive a new employment opportunity to negotiate
I like to keep an annual log of my accomplishments and values adds to a position. I learned this technique from a mentor with my prior employer. Also, I like to be mindful of my value season which is a time of year where my value at a company is exponentially higher than any other time during the year. In my industry, this season is the first quarter. Knowing these two things I am able to narrow down a time of the year I may have the most success with negotiating a change in my position, schedule, or salary.
Nic #4: Do not be afraid to ask and do not be afraid to walk away.
The art of negotiation was not taught in college. I did not realize it was a skill I needed to know until I was well into my career. Once I caught wind of this wondrous art form I worked to hone the skill. My first attempt at negotiating was unsuccessful. I highlighted my positive attributes, endorsed my skills, and explained how I would bring value to my new role to no avail. I requested a de-minis raise and to put it into perspective, I only requested an extra, $1500 a year. That’s right, I only wanted an extra $57 a paycheck. My request was denied. In fact, the recruiter made a point to share with me that the department’s head approved my request but that the organization was denying my raise. Furthermore, I was encouraged to work overtime if I wanted to make more money. In hindsight I should have used my common sense and walked away from the position. At the time I was young and naive. I quickly learned the power of negotiation depends on one’s ability to walk away from an unfair deal.
Not too long after I reluctantly accepted the role, a white male colleague from my previous department asked me about the process as he was anxious to change roles too. I shared my experience and warned about the negotiation process. A few months later my white male colleague was hired by another department. He shared his experience with me and bragged about successfully negotiating a new salary. I now ask myself ‘what would a white man do?’ lol. Never again will I walk away from a negotiation table empty handed.
Nic #5: Do your research
I think this is where it is important to know your value and to stay up to date with your industry’s trends. I like to stay in communication with recruiters to have a pulse on the job market. My motto is always be prepared. I always have an idea of what my salary should be and what others companies would pay someone with my skillset. This allows me to prudently negotiate my salary when the time comes without insulting the recruiter or undercutting myself. Use tools like Glassdoors to monitor your salary range and LinkedIn to build rapport with recruiters in your field or fields you are interested in. This will keep you on your toes as opportunities open up.
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Pride & Prejudice OR Pregnant & Prejudice?
Embarking on the journey to single parenthood has made me realize progressive science is not synonymous with progressive ideology. People of color, singles, and same sex couples have many hurtles to overcome in the pursuit of fertility including discrimination in the medical community. Recently I asked a friend who had successfully undergone fertility treatment with her same sex partner if she felt she had experienced prejudices while participating in the process and she responded with a resounding “YES’’! I think it is a plausible theory that most nontraditional couples or singles will experience some form of discrimination during the fertility process. Treatment and ‘proper’ family planning was likely created with heterosexual couples in mind but like most things, over time it evolved into a viable option for others like myself.
In my blog post ‘Get yo fertility screening’ I briefly discuss my first consultation with a fertility physician at an esteemed teaching hospital. It was apparent that the doctor had a moral dilemma with my request to seek fertility assistance as a single woman. In an effort to project her values on to me the doctor insisted I consider other options such as freezing my eggs while waiting to be married. I was completely mortified by the mere suggestion that her personal values had a place in my consultation. It was important for me to remember that doctors are human too and therefore, capable of bringing their unconscious (and sometimes very conscious) biases into the workplace. Make sure to do your research and advocate for yourself when deciding on a doctor. In the end I was able to find a progressive physician who not only supported my decision to get pregnant but strongly encouraged me to explore all options, single or otherwise. My doctor developed a comprehensive plan based on facts and my biological metrics that was flexible enough to incorporate variables like meeting a mate in the future. I got lucky.
However, that is where my luck ran out. I learned I had a fibroid during my initial fertility screening. It was only then that I discovered how common fibroids are among women of color. According to episode 62 of the ‘This is Infertility’ podcast, 80% of women will be diagnosed with fibroids and of those women, most will be black women. Also, the podcast episode mentioned there is no proven method to prevent fibroids and in some cases fibroids may lead to infertility. This led me to believe that there may be a deficiency in the medical community when it comes to research. I pondered on why women of color were not routinely screened for fibroids given the fact we are the most impacted. It is not enough to know that it is a common condition especially if this condition may be disproportionally causing infertility in our community.
Another area of vulnerability that is disproportionately impacting women of color is the maternal mortality rate. Pursuant to the CDC approximately 700 women die each year in the country as result of pregnancy and delivery complications. These deaths are FOUR to FIVE times more likely to occur among women of color when compared to white women. Many advocates believe this disparity is due to systemic racism in the medical community. Currently there is a campaign called ‘Hear Her’ which is designed to address some of the preventable pregnancy related deaths. Personally, I do not think we can truly mitigate the risk of maternal mortality if we do not address racism in the medical field.
In closing this article is not an attack on science or the medical community but rather a call to action. I am grateful for our doctors, nurses, medical staff, first responders, and the people in the lab researching ways to eradicate illness and extend our quality of life. However, the job cannot end there. There has to be a concerted effort to end racism and prejudices in all areas but especially in the medical field. Unlike any other industry prejudices in the medical community can lead to a fatality. All doctors should want to render adequate medical care to their patience regardless of race, creed, socioeconomic background, marital status, gender, or sexual orientation.
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Study Abroad
Back in my college years I had the opportunity to study abroad in Dublin, Ireland. While there I took International Economics and my senior capstone. It was my first international trip and my most memorable traveling experience. Aside from studying abroad we got to really live abroad. We lived in a beautiful apartment by ourselves, traveled to Paris, France for our friend’s birthday, and participated in preplanned excursions.
One of the first excursions the university planned for us was a tour of the Jameson Irish Whiskey factory where we got to sample some Jameson! Our guide introduced us to the classic combo of Jameson and ginger ale. Over the years this drink has become my staple.
Fun Facts: (1)There were 5 of us who came from my university and hung out together during the entire study abroad program. Most of us have stayed in contact. (2) After we completed our final for our capstone class we walked back to our apartment which was located across the street from the Australian embassy and downed an entire bottle of Jameson to celebrate. The kicker is it was still morning! Oh to be college age again, I could never do that now. (3) I was under age 21 when I studied abroad but the legal drinking age in Ireland was 18.
Ingredients
- Ice cubes
- 1 oz of Jameson
- 6-8 oz of your choice of ginger ale or ginger beer
- Garnish with a lime (optional)
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Number One vs The Only One
As a byproduct of 2 thriving marginalized communities in the education systems I became acutely aware of racism and sexism upon entering the workforce. Allow me to elaborate.
I attended a single sex, all girls high school where I excelled socially and academically. My school was a part of a very small community of special acceptance public schools in the inner-city that offered a rigorous program only consisting of rapid, star, or advanced placement classes. Our regular curriculum and extra curricular activities included foreign languages, music (I took a piano class), ceramics, dance, and theater. In addition, we were required to take the PSATs every year and provided with free SAT prep courses. Essentially, the objective was for us to compete and perform academically on a collegiate level. In fact, there was an annual contest held where classes were encouraged to compete in athletic and academic challenges. My class won all 4 years, shout out to the class of 249!
Also, in high school I served in a myriad of elected leadership positions in student government, participated on a dance team, and volunteered as the girl’s varsity team’s statistician. All while carrying a full course load that include not one but two math and science courses. We were never made to feel inadequate because we were female. We were taught to carry the attitude of champions. Our teacher’s were expected to challenged us in ways to inspire critical and independent thinking as well as creativity. I attribute some of my strong will as a female in male dominated spaces to the school’s unwavering belief in our ability to perform at the highest levels regardless of our gender.
Following high school I decided to attend a historically black university. I was accepted into predominantly white institutions but I felt compelled to attend a HBCU after participating in a college tour during the spring break of my sophomore year. In college I was recognized for my leadership and academic achievements too. I had been awarded a full tuition scholarship for all four years and I was the recipient of the Governor’s scholarship my junior year. Additionally, I served as the Business Club President, Treasurer of my class, Student Leader Ambassador, and Algebra Tutor and Counselor for the Upward Bound program. Simply, I excelled as a student, though my social life was a bit of a reck. The introduction of men back into my space was a distraction. I definitely see the benefits of single sex schooling but that is a different conversation.
It is my contention both schools shielded me from the injustices I would later experience in the real world. Both schools offered a competitive environment for me to blossom free of adversity.
It was not until I entered the workforce that my intellectual and leadership capabilities were questioned. I was confused considering my background and eduction history. The only variable between school and work was the change in the leadership construct. The leadership team in my first corporate job was almost exclusively made up of white males. Again, this power dynamic made me acutely aware of sexism and racism even if it was covert and unintentional. As a black woman I believe I was often perceived as inferior in work environments. Again, this revelation was bewildering. I will admit both my high school and college made attempts to prepare me for this type of discrimination but they both fell short. In high school we were taught to compete intellectually but unfortunately race was overlooked. Whereas, in college we were taught about the African American experience but not the gender experience. So when I was thrusted into the working world where my gender and race mattered and not in a good way, I did not fair well. To be fair there was definitely an effort to be more inclusive of women in leadership but those women rarely were women of color. It was blatantly obvious that corporate leadership lacked racial diversity. Suddenly, I was not competing to be number one anymore. I was competing to at least be the only one in the room who looked like me.
It was an unspoken and unwritten understanding that depending on the prestige of a position there could only be one or maybe two diversity hires. Furthermore, if a black woman did somehow manage to successfully score a leadership role, it seemed her qualifications were scrutinized to a higher degree. An example of this scrutiny would be what I experienced while working for a prior employer. At this job a black female was announced as the first black and first female district manager in that county’s history. It was a monumental accomplishment minimized by a few insecure men on the job. Before meeting her, I had heard many unpleasant rumors about her competencies and sexual favors performed for the role; it was deplorable. Apparently we women can only screw our way to the top. Finally before leaving the company I had the opportunity to meet this historic woman for myself. She was very much competent and capable of her job. Plus she advocated for other black women.
Another issue I experienced in corporate was the the gender and race pay gap! My former male counterparts frequently and obnoxiously discussed their salaries on the floor. So it did not take much effort on my end to learn I was being compensated much less for performing the same job. It is a very toxic culture but thankfully it is changing. In closing, I am grateful for my high school and college experiences. These institutions protected me from during my most formidable and impressionable years. They allowed me to thrive in environments conducive to growth and absent of discrimination. I had been beaten but not broken in corporate America as a result of my education.
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Finding gratitude in solitude, the traveler’s edition.
Let me first preface this post by saying I do not prefer solo traveling over traveling with a buddy but for most single people, it may be an inevitable reality at some point. The good news is solo traveling does not have to be lonely and at times it may just be the most optimal choice. As a person who has gone on multiple solo trips plus moved crossed country alone twice, I wanted to share some nics to help you plan for your next solo travel experience. Below I detail the gems that have helped me navigate my first international solo trip to Greece back in 2018.
Nic#1: Research is essential, I reached out to my former high school classmate who had just visited Greece a few months before me. I inquired about hotel accommodations and she graciously shared a list of 5 star hotels she lodged at while in Greece. In the end I stayed at The Stanley in Athens. It is a very nice 5 star hotel with great accommodations including an onsite bar and restaurant, complimentary breakfast, a friendly staff, and a beautiful view of the Acropolis.
Nic#2: Encourage family and friends to download WhatsApp and/or Google voice to stay in communication at little to no cost. I borrowed my mom’s phone which had an international phone plan but I mostly used my boost mobile phone during the trip. I heavily relied on communication apps powered by WIFI to eliminate the need for an international phone plan. Technology has advanced exponentially since my first international trip in 2008 when I needed a calling card. Do you remember international calling cards?
Nic#3: Book excursions online and ahead of time. Oftentimes, tours may sellout quickly because of bulks sales reserved by hotels or travel agents. To ensure you can score tickets on the best tours and optimize your time, plan ahead. Plus booking activities a head of time adds an extra layer of protection for credit card purchases which does wonders for budget monitoring.
Nic#4: In the theme of planning ahead, outline your trip in an itinerary. As a solo traveler you must always be vigilant and make prudent decisions regarding your safety. Preparing an itinerary will ensure your family and friends are aware of your whereabouts at all times. Also, be sure to print a copy for yourself in case of an emergency or if WIFI is inaccessible. This document should have pertinent details like the US embassy location, allergens, and emergency contact information.
Nic#5: Use a fanny pack. A fanny pack may not be the most fashion forward accessory but it is practical especially since you will not have a travel buddy to watch your belongings while you’re preoccupied. This around the waist pouch will ensure important items such as your passport, money, itinerary, and phone are stored securely on your person. Furthermore, it is easily accessible to you while a deterrent to thieves.
Nic#6: Make necessary transportation arrangements before arriving at your international destination. Traveling abroad may not be as simple as hailing a cab or booking an Uber. It is a good idea to learn the best modes of transportation ahead of time so you can plan accordingly. I called the Stanley Hotel before my trip and scheduled a cab to pick me up at the airport. Also, you may want to consider strategically booking excursions that offer hotel pick ups. This will eliminate the need to figure out other transportation arrangements once you arrive at your destination. Most of my transportation arrangements in Greece were preplanned with the exception of my visit the Acropolis Museum, I took the metro.
Nic#7: Download a good translator app to communicate with others. Fortunately in most European countries I’ve visited there are British translations everywhere but I had my trusted Google translator just in case.
Nic#8: Pay attention to flight arrangements. I messed up in this area twice while on my trip to Greece. First, I did not realize there were 2 airports in Rome when I booked my flight to Greece. My initial flight to Italy included an 8 hour layover for an 18 hour total flight time. In hindsight if I knew then what I know now I would have booked my flight directly to Greece vs flying into Italy. However, that part of the error was not entirely my fault but what was my fault was the booking of the hotel. I was clearly jetlagged and delirious upon arrival in Italy only to discover at the hotel, which I strategically booked to be near the airport for my next flight was not near the same airport I would be flying out of in less than 4 hours. Thankfully, my friend brought this erroneous error to my attention just in time for me time to make alternative arrangements for a cab and a wake up call. It would have been better to discover this error sooner but I learned a valuable lesson which was to always check the airport location when booking a flight. Next, print your boarding pass. We live in a mostly digitized world but some modern day conveniences may not be available internationally. I ran into this issue when flying back to Italy from Greece. I will spare you the details.
Nic#9: Exchange your currency at your local bank rather than at the airport to save on exchanges fees. These fees tend to be higher at the airport. Also, you can reduce the amount of cash you will need to carry around by preplanning as mentioned in nic #3.
Nic#10: Fear forward, have fun, and make new friends. I have met several other solo travelers during my own solo trips and you will never be alone if you plan accordingly.
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A daddy and a baby caddy
Many women today are electing nontraditional paths to parenthood. Still, biologically a male must be involved in the baby making process as sperm is a crucial component. Today there are tons of options available such as cryobanks or more informally know as sperm banks all over the country that offer a variety of donors to father a child. The benefit of choosing a cryobank is the level of autonomy while deciding on your child’s potential father and the mitigation of legal procedures to ensure parental rights. Additionally, the male donors are heavily screened for diseases, over 300 genetic disorders, and family medical history. As a bonus some men volunteer lifetime photos, personality test, and the ability for your child to contact their biological father in the future. The selection process can be overwhelming which is why it may be helpful to consult your fertility clinic for guidance. Below is a list of questions you may want to consider while shopping around to help you discern the best options. Every cryobank site has a FAQ section with most answers to questions you’ll need to know.
Good luck on your journey and happy shopping!
Donor questions:
- How much does each sample (straw or vial) cost?
- Are the samples washed?
- How often is the donor list updated?
- How are donors screened? How often?
- What genetic screening is done on the donors?
- How many samples from one donor are sent to one geographic area and nationwide?
- How much does it cost to send the sample to clinic?
- What is the procedure for returning the sample(s), if not used? Is there a fee for restoring the returned samples?
- What is the charge for returning the tank? How is that arrangement made?
- How many samples from the chosen donor are currently available? If I become pregnant using this donor sample, can I buy and store more samples for possible future use?
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Dolla Holla
Hey Nickels, this blog post is dedicated to my penny counters, money stackers, and bargain trackers. Recently one of my favorite vloggers uploaded a Dollar Tree video highlighting some purchases but honestly, I do not think this vlogger did the Dollar Tree any justice. This store is filled with so many wonderful gems and if you have insight on how much these things typically cost you will be able to easily identify a deal. So here are my TOP TEN best Dollar Tree purchases.
Nic 1: Greeting cards- you can purchase 2 for 1 Hallmark branded greeting cards for every occasion! That’s right $.50 cards. Outside of creating your own cards, you cannot beat this price!Nic 2: Press on nails- I know press-on nails have gained popularity during the quarantine but your girl has been wearing them long before then. The dollar tree has some pretty cool designs plus traditional styles like French manicure. Personally, I like press-on nails because you can go from meek to chic in just a few minutes. I constantly get compliments on my nails and I love to see the surprise on someone’s face when I tell them they are press-ons.
Nic #3: Travel essentials- back when I did travel I often traveled with a personal bag because I refused to pay the checked bag fees. I could seriously stuff a week’s worth of clothing in my backpack but that’s another post. I have purchased my reusable plastic bag, reusable 3 oz bottles, hypoallergenic facial clothes, wet-ones, and mosquito bracelets, sewing kit, and a whole host of other items all from the Dollar Tree!
Nic#4: Eyelashes- I know, you may think I am crazy but hear me out. The L.A. Colors brand is sold at beauty supply stores for much more than $1 and the Dollar Tree has them for just $1 plus glue. I have purchased eyelashes from Sephora and Target before and the L.A. Colors brand is pretty comparable if you like a natural looking eyelash. However, if you are going for a more dramatic look, the Dollar Tree may not be the store for you.
Nic#5: Nail polish and nail essentials- I like a nice pedicure but if you have not guessed it by now, I am money conscious. If I can DIY, I will and polishing my toenails unlike my fingernails is pretty manageable. The L.A. color nail polish is pretty decent and comes in an assortment of colors. I have used products like Essie and honestly, I cannot tell the difference but then again, I am not a professional.
Nic#6: Daily Pill storage container- I take multiple vitamins daily and a pill case helps me to manage my vitamin intake. I absolutely love this container!
Nic#7: Drinkware- the caveat is drinkware is only discounted when you need less than a set of 2 or 4. Otherwise, I would recommend actually splurging on a nice glassware set. However, as a single person who is often in need of just one cup, the Dollar Tree is the spot for itemized and singular glassware. You can find a variety of items like a champagne flutes, coffee mugs, and water goblets.
Nic#8: Bakeware- I lie to you not, if you are a novice at baking and simply do not bake often, the Dollar Tree can fulfill your basic baking essentials needs. You can get cake pans, a cupcake pan, baking sheets, and even cake storage containers from the Dollar Tree. You will not be able to beat this price anywhere. My bakeware has gotten regular use with minimum rusting.
Nic#9: Facial Mask- Oh YES, the brand, YES is sometimes sold at the dollar tree . These one time use facial mask are sold for much more at Target so this a true bargain.
Nic#10: Home repair essentials- I have put may holes in many walls at various apartments throughout the years and I have always gotten my full deposit back thanks to Dollar Tree spackle. The holes in the walls just disappear.
